Conversations I wish I could have with people

Me: I was attacked by a posse of roving wombats on the way in this morning.

Friend: What?

Me: Normally they would have been no match for my honor guard, but since I was riding alone and had left my sword-stick at home, one of them was able to get past my mind barrier and scratched me with his foreclaws. I had to use a healing meditation technique to remove the poison from my body.

Friend: Uh huh.

Unfortunately, I'm to reserved to prevaricate so extravagently on a day-to-day basis.